Appropriate Clothing
While pursuing Facebook I ran into a post regarding the upscale clothing store, J. Crew. My Facebook friend was positive he was not part of the store’s demographic. I immediately latched onto the demographic element of his posting, though I was the only participant to do so. I actually found a demographic breakdown of J Crew on the web and found its average buyer is 41, owns a home and has an income over 70,000 a year. Obviously I also am no longer part of J. Crew demographic, though in moments of delusion I can rationalize that an average is not a median age.
My mind went in this direction because, well, I am a closet retail junkie. Several years ago I did a lot of reading, watching and analyzing of the retail industry. I have limited actual experience but vast academic knowledge of a variety of retail topics. I think I was a retailer in a past life but then I must have had several past lives; last week I thought I had been an investigative reporter. I recently read that a growing trend among the next generation is to become experts in a field without formal training. Well I am a bit ahead of the trend since I have done this in a variety of fields over the years. That liberal arts education pays off again. Trends, by the way, are a big topic in the retail industry.
I began to evaluate the target market of J.Crew and found I was a bit too old for their product. This in spite of the publicity the store has gained from its most famous customer, First Lady Michelle Obama, who is a bit older than I am. The issue of “appropriate clothing” reared its ugly head in my mind once again.
The Baby Boom culture has done wonders at delaying age. If fitness and nutrition do not work, plastic and liposuction get the job done. Television shows us mothers and daughters wearing each other’s clothing, the mother glowing with accomplishment. Life is not like television and most teenage daughters ( I have/had two) will immediately toss any item her mother designates as “cute.” This immediate hatred also works with music, TV, movies or any life suggestions. Once your teen has forgotten it was her mother who recommended something, they buy it, watch it and embrace the concept. Mom finally learns to not recommend anything, until her darlings begin calling her Mommy. This is the point where gentle suggestions can be made.
Mothers, in their quest for youth, sometimes forget they are “Mom.” The classic example is the mother who wears suggestive clothing to her adolescent boy’s school events. The boys remember; my husband does after forty years. Another lapse is wearing your daughter’s clothing to a mixed event, like a graduation party. I have never seen my daughter, and her friends, so disturbed as when a friend’s mother wore her daughter’s clothing to a graduation party. All the kids could say was the whole experience was disturbing, and in teen talk, “So Wrong.” There is a time and a place for everything, including being Mom instead of needing to say, “I am a vibrant woman.” Obviously this lesson had yet to be learned by one woman of my acquaintance.
This is the context I address the “appropriate clothing” dilemma. There are many brands that market to a wide range of age groups. A notable brand is “Lilly Pulitzer.” Their FB page glorifies the child, maiden, woman and grandmother who wear “Lilly.” I was around when “Lilly” made her comeback, twenty years ago, I could not afford “Lilly” then but I still want to wear this brand. I want to buy a closet full of the dresses for myself, my daughters and any little girl I happen to come across. This type of marketing is rare. I do not have a pair of UGGS. My daughters needed me to not buy them. So I passed. Knowing how young women respond when “Mom” intrudes on their turf, I have “passed” on a fair amount of fashion choices. My eldest daughter revels in our matching sweatshirts, acquired at a mother’s sorority weekend. It took many years for this transition to take place. She can now wear the same sweatshirt as “Mom.” My younger daughter is still appalled by the idea.
I never want to be the woman who is trying to compete with her daughter. I have seen (and maybe experienced) the effects when women compete with other women years their junior in fashion or beauty. Let’s be honest, plastic cannot compare to real youth. When real youth is desired, maturity walks out the door, recognizing a futile battle. So what clothes should clothe my wisdom? I am not sure. If they fit, I am probably in the J. Crew demographics. I think I will pass. What I wear in public, when I actually make an effort, (totally different blog-ever heard of passive aggression?) should reflect who I am, a mature woman.
I may have out grown a lot of different retailers. Please note; I already have the short suit pants the Wall Street Journal was showing in its last fashion issue, not to mention the wide variety of PJ’s shown on Haute Couture runways. (I guess the fashion mavens finally realized there is no reason to get dressed.) Please, of course I did not buy from the latest collections. Some items I have, and my men’s suit pants fit me fine. Passing on J.Crew is no sacrifice. Hear Mrs. Obama has some pretty good designers working for her these days. My advice, skip the PJ’s outside of the White House. Let’s leave the rest to the kids.
